Who cares to admit complete defeat? If we are honest, not many of us like to do so. Every natural instinct cries out against it. A lot of us are taught early on in life that admitting something like being powerless or surrendering is an act of failure, being a coward, or defeat. This is the furthest thing from the truth. Some of our greatest victories and freedoms can come from admissions like these. Here are some things we need to do as we become open to admitting we are powerless:
We need to stop denying the pain: When we become open to the pain we are experiencing it can turn into a great motivator. The pain we experience in recovery is no different from the pain we get with a cut. We get a cut; we then recognize the pain associated with it, and then we start a healing process with peroxide or a band-aid. Pain requires an action toward healing! It is in our best interest to stop playing God: I do not know about any of you but I make a terrible god. My will and best thinking got me into the messes I was. We are either going to serve God or self. We can’t do both! Matthew 6:24 says, “No one can be a slave to two masters; he will hate one and love the other; he will be loyal to one and despise the other.” One of the most common things we play god at is controlling our lives and the lives of those around us. If I focus on my wife’s life I do not have to look at the “stuff” in my own….just ask her, I have hers all figured out. By surrendering control, we gain a far greater power.
For a good blog on control check out this one from this amazingly hot woman I know: https://chadjfunk.wordpress.com/2011/02/15/control-let-go-and-let-god/
Here is where the journey of growth and change begins. We need to start admitting our powerlessness: When we first look at this it can be scary. Here are some good questions to ask yourself to see if you a truly ready: Have I really had enough? Have I hit my rock bottom or has the rock bottom come up and hit me? Can I control my issue in any form? What incidents have occurred as a result of my problem that I didn’t want to have happen? Do I honestly believe with all my being that I have a problem? If you can answer yes to any of these it is time to stop fighting and turn your life and will over to God. Jesus knew how difficult this is. He told us in Matthew 19:26, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible”.Along with admitting our powerlessness the 12 Step model suggests we start admitting that our lives have become unmanageable: Some us felt our lives had become unmanageable because we felt out of control emotionally, spiritually, mentally, or even physically. Or we began to feel guilty about our hurt, habit, or hang-up. Some of us have lost everything-our homes, our families, our jobs, and our self-respect. Some of us have never learned to function as human beings at all. Some of us have even come close to death. Whatever our individual circumstances, our lives have been ran by obsessive and compulsive behaviors, and the end result has been unmanageability.
The power to change only comes from God’s grace. We do have some footwork to put in however. We need to make sure we are working on our personal relationship with God. We need to make sure we are getting involved in community. We need to make sure we have an accountability team, sponsor, or mentor. We also need to start being honest. My sponsor will often tell me that I need to put my big boy pants on and start to walk through some of these things. Are you ready to admit you are powerless and that your life is unmanageable?
Today is the day I will admit I am powerless and stop relying on my own strength…Today is the day I will recover